Best and Worst of the Golden Globes

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Golden Globes, you do not disappoint! Last night’s award ceremony was one of the more fun telecasts I’ve seen in years. Celebrities finally seem willing to admit that it’s a fun, boozy party and nothing more. No one took their awards over-the-top too seriously. The camera editing proved that the stars were relaxed, and having a good ol’ time.

Here are some of my favorite moments – some in stunning animated gif form!

Tina Fey and Amy Poehler’s opening remarks – These ladies KILLED it. I never doubted it. They quickly put the audience, both in person and at home in a celebratory mood. With quick jokes on everyone from James Cameron, Quentin Tarentino and Anne Hathaway, they proved a hit from the very start. And, can we talk about STUNNING?! Both of these ladies looked divine.

Adele and Daniel Craig high-fiving – New mom Adele won for Best Song. So because she is awesome, she high-fives Daniel Craig. How the lucky lady restrained herself from a cheek kiss is beyond me. She’s just a smidge klassier than I am. I would have gone for it full-force, but that’s why I’m never invited to the Globes. It’s for the best.

 

Taylor Swift hates Adele for denying her ‘surprise face’ – Remember how I mentioned the camera guys knowing exactly who to cut to? We struck GOLD! After Adele’s win, the camera cuts to Taylor Swift, who wasn’t able to hide her disappointment and displeasure. And, I am a mean, wicked bitch, so I take glee in this. I’m not a huge fan of Swifty (and a huge Adele fan), so I take full mean-spirited pleasure in this.

Michael J. Fox’s son looks just like him! This makes me happy and so excited! I don’t know why, but I just really, really enjoy that. Marty McFly lives again. *sqeeeeeeeeeeeeee*

Bubba’s in the house – It’s nice to see Bill among the glitterati. These are his people and they love him. This must be what it’s like when the pack leader wolf returns after a hunt.

Tina and Amy’s fake nominees – Has this been done before? I don’t remember, but it seems like a simple, easy laugh to go after. I don’t remember what categories they did this for, but for a second, I legitimately thought Darcy St. Fudge was a real person with terrible teeth. Well played, ladies.

Drunk Glenn Close looks like how I dance when I’m drunk. I just wanted to point that out.

 

Of course, not everything was sunshine and roses. There were moments that brought down the show, or were just plain odd.

Cumberbatch and his cheekbones don’t win – Instead we have boring old Kevin Costner, who rambled through his speech, waxing poetic about the 1980s and the film industry. Cumberbatch should have just cut him with his cheekbones and we could move on.

Amy got to sit on George Clooney’s lap and I didn’t – This is not necessarily a worst moment, but it’s a jealous moment. Basically, this is how I imagine me and George Clooney all day long – rich and canoodling. Is this what the tabloids mean by canoodling?

Jonah Hill and Megan Fox present – Maybe the worst presenters of the night. (Not including Salma Hayek and Paul Rudd – their teleprompter was busted) Unintentionally awkward and tired. And these two claim to do comedy?

Lea Michele is the new tan mom – What is up girl? Ease up! It’s Wintertime. You’re supposed to be pale.

Jeremy Renner’s ‘stache is scary – Is he in the middle of growing it out?

Lena Dunham does that awful thing where she reads her speech – Ugh. I’m just not onboard with Girls. But, all that aside, it’s always terrible to read a speech off a piece of paper. That’s right READ A SPEECH. It wasn’t a list of names, which I can abide since you’re flustered and forget to thank someone, but to read a speech is awful. It’s like you’re back in middle school, practicing speaking in front of crowds, and you don’t know how, so you just read the speech and you sound monotone and terrible. She also snottily kind of thanked the other nominees for getting her through ‘middle school.’ Shut it down, preschool.

Jodie Foster is now taking the same weird meds as Mel Gibson – I respect that Jodie Foster wants to remain a private person and doesn’t want to discuss her sexuality on live TV. Fine. I’m more concerned that she seemed really hyper and jittery. Talking a mile a minute and sort of rambling on concerns me. I mean, we already know that she’s kind of batshit for sticking up for Mel Gibson so unwaveringly, but was she always like this? When Robert Downey Jr gives you a ‘wow’, you are making a crazy speech. This is what happens when you are a super private person, Jodie! You need to come out more so we remember your actual personality!

 

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